Marriage Rules

288 pages, 2012

Harriet Lerner

self-improvement

909 books

psychology

705 books

Takeaways

Description

In a format perfect for today's world, noted marriage expert Harriet Lerner presents 100 practical rules to help couples build enduring relationships in today's challenging world. As the author of The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships and a professional counselor with more than 40 years of experience, Lerner understands that long-term relationships are as complex and ever-changing as the individuals who participate in them.

This book offers new solutions to every aspect of your relationship—from calming things down and warming things up to talking straightly and fighting fairly. You'll also learn how to listen well as a spiritual practice, how to connect with a distant partner, and how to survive the unique challenges of children, stepchildren, difficult-laws, and divorce.

By following the rules in Marriage Rules, you can take back your marriage when things fall apart. Married or not, you will gain clarity and courage along with joyful conviction to aid you in navigating your relationship with insight and joy. ‍

Understanding Your Emotional Patterns

In 'Marriage Rules', Harriet Lerner encourages us to explore our emotional patterns. She believes that understanding our reactions and emotions can help us communicate better with our partners. So, take a look at your emotional habits and see how they affect your relationship.

The Importance of Apologizing

One key takeaway from 'Marriage Rules' is the importance of apologizing. Lerner emphasizes that saying sorry when you're wrong is crucial in a marriage. It's not about winning or losing, but about acknowledging mistakes and working towards a healthier relationship.

Listening is Key

Harriet Lerner stresses the importance of active listening in 'Marriage Rules'. She suggests that we should not just hear, but truly listen to our partners. This means putting aside our own thoughts and focusing on what our partner is saying. So, dig into your listening skills and see how it can improve your relationship.

Maintaining Your Individuality

In 'Marriage Rules', Lerner reminds us that it's important to maintain our individuality in a marriage. She suggests that we should not lose ourselves in the relationship, but rather continue to grow as individuals. So, check how you can balance your personal growth with your relationship growth.

The Power of Appreciation

The last key takeaway from 'Marriage Rules' is the power of appreciation. Lerner believes that expressing gratitude towards your partner can strengthen your bond. So, find ways to show your partner that you appreciate them and see how it can positively impact your relationship.

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